The event was three weeks away. Dani knew the first order of business was to call her beloved uncle Earl. He owned and operated a pot shop called the McCall Cannabis Company in a little town on the Southern Oregon Coast called Chetco. He knew more about cannabis than anyone alive in Oregon, and that was saying a lot.
Dani filled Uncle Earl in on the Trump gig and he cackled with delight at the prospect of Dani’s plan for the meal. It sure as shit wasn’t going to be PRIME RIB!
Earl suggested a cannabis edible hybrid of indica and sativa to maximize the invigorating, calming and contemplative pleasure of nature’s most wonderful plant. He’d grown it himself and named the strain Doug Fir Dank. He asked Dani the projected number of attendees. She told him. He whistled and said he’d be shipping her a load the size of a hay bale. Oh, and don’t worry about paying for it. Consider it my duty as an Oregonian who doesn’t hate modern Oregon like Republicans do.
Dani then told her dad of the scheme. He cracked a devious smile and gave her his blessing.
She gathered the staff and told them about the Trump event. They frowned. She showed them the menu. They booed. Then she told them about the change in menu and they laughed and applauded. This is my last gig, Dani told them. Then you take over. They all hugged and cried.
Dani’s plan was to substitute the Trump meal with her culinary invention she called Rainbow Wraps:
roasted red pepper
all wrapped up in a tortilla
Oh yeah, and a sliced up edible of Doug Fir Dank, too!