An OTA regular limped into my local OTA joint. His body was wrecked after three decades of logging.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I was sitting at my usual table writing my usual useless love letter.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The female OTA bartender came out from behind the bar carrying a cushion and handed it to the OTA man. I stopped writing and eavesdropped. The cushion was relief from a case of hemorrhoids. A white Russian with a Coors Light chaser also eased the pain.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Hemorrhoid Man is a master profane storyteller if gets wound up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He was wound up today and I listened to him deliver a monologue to another OTA man.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I was so stoned on gummies the last time in here I couldn’t walk.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n I shot a turkey through the passenger window of my truck. I saw the damn thing in the road, drove over, powered down the window, grabbed the shotgun, and blasted the son-of-a-bitch in the face. Took him home and cooked him up for supper.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n I love eating quail. I saw an old guy in Italy gut one with a knife, rip out all the meat, and fry it up in olive oil. Fucking delicious.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n My buddy’s terminally ill so I told him to walk five miles on the beach every morning, then fish and drink, until one day he died.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n I’ve got to get a new fucking dog\u2014a bird dog. Not a fucking Chihuahua.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n He kept on riffing but I went back to the useless love letter. As I was writing, I wondered if I am the only writer in America who writes about taverns and bars like I do. I mean is there someone writing about Montana Tavern Life or Michigan Tavern Life, and publishing them like I have for two decades? There has to be.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" An OTA regular limped into my local OTA joint. His body was wrecked after three decades of logging. I was sitting at my usual table writing my usual useless love letter. The female OTA bartender came out from behind the bar carrying a cushion and handed it to the OTA man. I stopped writing and […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":9764,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,15],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9763","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-meditations","category-oregon-tavern-age","has-post-title","has-post-date","has-post-category","has-post-tag","has-post-comment","has-post-author",""],"builder_content":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9763","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=9763"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9763\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9766,"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9763\/revisions\/9766"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/9764"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=9763"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=9763"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=9763"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}