A year ago, I lost all sense of purpose. Since then, I have attempted to find a new one. I asked for one. I applied for some. I mixed potions in a cauldron to invent one. I’ve read 300 books to stumble across one. I walked a thousand miles on the beach to inspire one. I’ve tried finding a new purpose so many times I’ve lost count.<\/p>\n
No concrete purpose has emerged. I can’t even glimpse a vague path in undiscovered country and I reconnoiter frequently.<\/p>\n
Maybe I should stop the reconnoitering and go on forays instead. Maybe I should ride out with a standard, perhaps even with a sidekick or existential six shooter. Maybe I should hit the real ground and bushwhack trails, blaze away, get the Natty Bumppo thing going. Maybe I should finally learn how to play a guitar and busk in the poorest town on the Oregon Coast. Maybe the ocean no longer can help me.<\/p>\n
It is a strange and unprecedented feeling for me to live without tangible purpose and to feel at times almost powerless to change that.<\/p>\n
Perhaps I need to redefine the meaning of the word \u201cpower\u201d and other words I thought I understood. I’ve already done so with words such as \u201cfamily\u201d and \u201cfriendship.\u201d Those were good redefinitions. There are many more to come. I may even take up the word \u201cocean\u201d and toss it around for something fresh.<\/p>\n
How do I summon a heretofore unknown power to find a new purpose? What must I still lose to attain clarity in how to proceed?<\/p>\n
Is there purpose in purposelessness? Maybe I’ll never find a large noble (paid) purpose but enact tiny (free) healing ones around me. That’s not so bad, is it? The need is everywhere.<\/p>\n
(If you found this post enjoyable, thought provoking or enlightening, please consider supporting a writer at work by making a financial contribution to this blog or by purchasing an NSP book.) <\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
A year ago, I lost all sense of purpose. Since then, I have attempted to find a new one. I asked for one. I applied for some. I mixed potions in a cauldron to invent one. I’ve read 300 books to stumble across one. I walked a thousand miles on the beach to inspire one. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3012,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[37,5],"tags":[16,6,96],"class_list":["post-3011","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-lost-and-found","category-meditations","tag-lost-and-found","tag-matt-love","tag-ocean","has-post-title","has-post-date","has-post-category","has-post-tag","has-post-comment","has-post-author",""],"builder_content":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3011","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3011"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3011\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3013,"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3011\/revisions\/3013"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3012"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3011"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3011"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3011"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}